Friday, August 12, 2011

ridiculousness and then some


There is only one word to describe today: crazy! Seriously, picture the most ridiculous social event you have been to in the last year and multiply the amount of ridiculousness by ten. That is what it is like to be with more than two South Africans at any time and today I was with over thirty.

Every Friday in Kimberley, all of the coaches, head coaches, site coordinators and interns attend a daylong development session. During the session the coaches reflect on the previous week, go over the interventions for the upcoming week, role-play different scenarios of what might happen next week and get paid. And in between every activity or during any down time all of the coaches will just spontaneously break into song and dance. It is the most entertaining thing to watch and the most fun thing to take part in. I promise that I will get a video of it next week and believe me – you will want to see this.

I walked into the recreation center where we hold these development sessions and I was instantly floored. There were at least twenty people in a giant circle clapping their hands, singing songs (a lot of which are call and repeat) and dancing. After a brief moment of hesitation I jumped into the circle and just tried to follow along. More than one person laughed at me, but I’ve learned that when they laugh at you it means they like what you are doing… I think… So after about 30 minutes of those shenanigans, which I might add were some of the most cardio-intense minutes of my life, everyone took a seat and the development session began. Right at the beginning I got to introduce myself. At the end of my introduction someone from the crowd yelled out, “Are you available?” Somehow, despite the recent sensory overload, I responded with a surprisingly witty, “it depends on who’s asking.” The room erupted with laughter, which again, I think is a good thing.

Shortly after I introduced myself, Thuso tapped me on the shoulder and motioned for me to follow him outside. I should have stayed inside because when we got outside he handed me the keys to the Tazz (our car) and made me drive. There are no words to describe what it feels like to drive a manual car for the first time on the wrong side of the road with your boss sitting right next to you. I spent that entire drive mentally coaching myself. Ease off the clutch while you accelerate. Ignore the terrible jerk of the car… you’ll get better. Now, clutch and shift to second. All right we’re turning. NO! Don’t turn into oncoming traffic! The left! The left! GET ON THE LEFT! Whew… Okay now accelerate. Let’s try third. Uh ohh… a stop sign… what do I do? Um… try neutral?

Somehow, I drove the 15 kilometers from the development session to the office and I only stalled twice. But the fun didn’t stop there. Oh no, because making me drive to the office was too easy, once we got there, Thuso realized he forgot his keys, so I had to turn around and repeat the trip all over again. And even after the traumatizing driving excursions, Thuso decided he’d give me another fun job; I got to walk down the street, from the bank to the office, carrying a bag of R3000 (1USD = R6.7). My third day on the job and already I was in charge of a week’s worth of salaries… I was terrified. But I got through the day, I got through more driving – I was even told that I picked up the driving better than Trevor (shocker!) and I was given the nickname “Blessings.” So all in all, not a bad day.

And after the day ended, the night began (you know – the same way it does in the US). We were invited to go out to a sports bar and watch Orlando Pirates vs. Black Leopards (the first match of the season) with some of the coaches. None of the coaches have cars, so when we want to hang out – or when we are invited out – we have to go pick all the coaches up. I don’t know what I was thinking, but for some reason I volunteered to be the designated driver. Boy was I in for a treat. We drove out to Rhodepan (one of the townships) and picked up Robert, Graham and Mzala. Remember when I mentioned that having more than two South Africans together leads to ridiculousness? Well put three South Africans in a small car after they have been drinking and BAM! The funniest part about the entire drive was how they reacted to my driving. Whenever I had a rough start or I had trouble shifting gears, the car would naturally jerk and/or make a bit of a grumbly noise and as soon as this happened the coaches would all get deathly silent and you could almost hear them praying that this little white girl wasn’t going to kill them.

I didn’t kill them and we made it to the sports bar. It was just like any other sports bar really – a bit grungy, and filled with guys, smoke and beer. I got a 660mL Castle Lite. Yes, they sell their beer in 660 mL bottles and it costs only R12 (a little less than 2USD). Castle Lite however, is just that – light. It’s 4% alcohol by volume and kind of tastes like water. But it’s cheap, right?

It was a fun night. We met quite a few people and on more than one occasion I felt like a bit of a celebrity. Or maybe attraction is a better word. But all I had to do when someone approached me was talk about soccer, smile, and say, “baie dankie” (thank you in Afrikaans) a few times and I was golden. A couple guys approached me at one point and said that if anyone bothered me I just had to tell them and they would handle it. A few other people came up to us and said they were so happy we were there visiting them in their homes and in their bars. Just like anywhere in the world, the people here are mostly good. Sure there are a few bad eggs (I haven’t met any yet, thank goodness) but for the most part when people steal or break the law here it is so they can get by. I have officially decided that I really like it here. It’s new, but it’s a good kind of new. It’s different, but it’s a good kind of different. It’s crazy, but it’s a good kind of crazy. 

No comments:

Post a Comment